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Sminttoot's Original Compositions

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1Sminttoot's Original Compositions Empty Sminttoot's Original Compositions Wed Nov 16, 2011 3:48 am

Sminttoot

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Hello and welcome to my book!
I'll be exposing one of my simple works. I'll be adding some later on.
Enjoy this one!


Her
(counterpart for "Him")


She was the one that caught my eye
Her heavenly laugh, I wish I was beside
Others may not understand her attitude
But for me, she's the one I don't wanna be aloof.

Suddenly, she stopped and stared on nothing
Her hair caught by the summer breeze's singing
On her eyes were just a pint of loneliness
But for me, it was an iota of doubtfulness.

I simply don't care about all my treasure
For she was the one I'd be with forever, I'm sure
She smiled at me for she thought we were friends
Deep inside me, wedding is where it'd end.

If I hadn't met her, I am nothing
If I hadn't liked here, I am still nothing
Now that I loved her, she's my everything
And so I thank God I finally found her.

A kiss from her is all I wanted
And it happened in my dream, so enchanted
The kiss from her just gave me a reason
That I must love here, and be in unison.

How I wished I'd be given a chance to talk
But her stares and smiles crowd my throat
I always see her like an angel in disguise
Disguised, for she was my future bride.

Inside my deepest and wildest imaginations
I fool myself that she loves me more and more
I realized that she is really the one
The one that I am really afraid to be gone.

If not because of these purple chains
I would've got her under my spell
Oh, when will you see me as your lover
When all you are doing is having your eyes covered?
You're only seeing me as your hater.

2Sminttoot's Original Compositions Empty Re: Sminttoot's Original Compositions Sat Nov 19, 2011 6:16 am

Shian

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Beautiful! Poetry is the best way to express love for other people! I think it's great you also used parts that didn't ryme together at all. Poetry isn't ALL about getting words to rhyme. My i suggest that this would make a great song? I'm pretty sure base can sing it!

3Sminttoot's Original Compositions Empty Re: Sminttoot's Original Compositions Fri Nov 25, 2011 1:22 pm

Sminttoot

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@Animinus

Thanks!
Yeah, Base may sing it for us.
But you know, "Him" was more beautiful than this.
If I'd get a chance to scan my books here, I may post "Him" here.
By the way, that "Him" is not my composition. Just "Her". :)


Well, as promised, here's my other composition.
This poem is all about a boy's praises to the girls which she loved before, but failed him in their relationships. The whole poem would appear to be ironic. Enjoy!

Praises for the Rose

Its alluring traps when wholly held
Results to pain and my rough hands bled
In the apex of these traps then appears
A beautiful rose in its soaring career.

You, white rose, such heavenly sight
As the sun strikes your petals, you ignite
Such fragrant aroma distorts my being
Making me crazy, feels like I'm flying.

This pink rose gives me a vivid memento
Of a pretty girl blushing when she's in solo
Its virginity beautifies this mournful day
And leaves a mark to remember even when away.

The queen of them all, I call it superior
And the other colors considered inferior
For this red, red rose, I give you an honor
The most beautiful of them all, no matter what it mirrors.

You elegantly sparkle in my naked eye
Thus, it gives a reduction for my feeling of ire
You, like a woman, I see you as sublime
And for you, I offer everything in my life.

Though your thorns hurt me as I touch you
This pain motivates me to not to stop loving you
No matter how it cuts my precious heart
It's just like that; true love hurts.

The drops of your nectar makes me sober
Your honeyed kisses go here and there
As a butterfly peacefully lands on these creatures
So is my love for you, going through an adventure.

How I thanked the Lord for He created
These beautiful flowers no one would not want them
For them, beautiful flowers, I offer these praises
And thanks, for breaking my heart into pieces.

4Sminttoot's Original Compositions Empty Re: Sminttoot's Original Compositions Sun Nov 27, 2011 3:30 am

Leah7

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Wow, I really love your grammar, layout, diction, flow/rhythm, and style!

You have some great descriptions and very lovely metaphors. I'd really like to see you describe "elegance."

Great work, thanks for sharing!!!

http://gateway-2-rpg.4umer.net

5Sminttoot's Original Compositions Empty Re: Sminttoot's Original Compositions Sun Nov 27, 2011 7:52 am

Sminttoot

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^

Thanks for that.
I'd share some poems again next time. Too lazy to open my notebook. :)

6Sminttoot's Original Compositions Empty Re: Sminttoot's Original Compositions Sun Dec 11, 2011 11:49 pm

Sminttoot

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Hello again!
I'll be sharing another quick poem that I have created for a grave and dumb reason.

Nature of the poem
I created this poem because of my problems especially with my mom.
This is way too personal, so I'll narrow the description down.
I almost committed suicide, and I had wrote my suicide letter already.
Thank God it didn't happen. I fell asleep. :D
The poem only contains 4 stanzas.
There are confusions in the poem, but it obviously shouts what I feel that time.

Without further ado, here is my quick poem.

Suicide

I grabbed a knife, red
Cut my pulse, bled
Evil came, led
With all tears, shed.

A fragile heart, broken
My faith in Him, shaken
Escaping reality, hasten
Noose on neck, fasten.

My family, destroyed
To wrongness, employed
In redundance, annoyed
On death bridge, deployed.

I grabbed her knife, slashed
Cut my pulse, gashed
Stone to head, smashed
My love for her, crushed.

7Sminttoot's Original Compositions Empty Re: Sminttoot's Original Compositions Tue Feb 21, 2012 8:47 pm

Raizen

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Those are great !! Nice share... ;)

8Sminttoot's Original Compositions Empty Re: Sminttoot's Original Compositions Tue Jul 17, 2012 6:23 am

Sminttoot

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Wooh just came back from a long inactivity.
I'll be posting some of my latest works.
I'd still need to find them for I write poems anywhere: be it notebooks, scratch papers, etc.

9Sminttoot's Original Compositions Empty Re: Sminttoot's Original Compositions Fri Aug 10, 2012 5:57 am

Assassin_1

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Great Poem!

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